Be careful when folks ask you to pray

What to do when someone asks you to pray for them

Your integrity is at stake when someone asks you to pray for them.

I couldn’t decide where to post this post about praying for others.

I was going to post it on, but it seems such a great post for pastors wives and church first ladies. So, here it is, Baby! 🙂

Listen to my podcast exploring wise responses when someone asks you to pray for them.

Has anyone ever asked you to pray for them? How do you handle the request?

Through the years, I’ve learned there is a “good” way and a “not so good” way to respond.  Guess how I know. I was usually the one asking someone to pray for me!

From time to time, their responses left me feeling humiliated or even judged. That was the last thing I needed during those struggles. In the end, each time, I knew I had asked the wrong person. Yeah, I’ve learned some lessons from those situations. Can you relate?

Here’s what I wished those people knew, so I’m sharing with you:

The first step when someone asks you to prayer is to make sure you don’t judge them in any way. Hey, we are not perfect; how could we judge anyone anyway? 

Be sure to tell your face and your eyes this message. People can spot you faking or trying to hide something. If you can’t control yourself, just say “Wow, give me a minute here”. Be real.

Praying for others is no small thing. It’s, in fact, everything. It’s the most powerful service you can offer.

Secondly, put ourselves in their shoes – especially if they confess something really sensitive, compromising, or private. I often ask myself, how would I feel about disclosing this to someone? It makes me more sensitive to them.

Sometimes, people will share information about marriage woes, sexual orientation, abuse, and more. Put yourself in their place and treat them how you’d want to be treated in such a situation.  What do you do?

Guard their privacy when someone asks you to pray for them.

Usually, there is absolutely no reason to share their prayer request. NONE! In the podcast, I give a couple of scenarios in which you might need to share, but they are rare.

Be a blessing…IRL when someone asks you to pray.

If appropriate, consider asking how you can support them in real practical ways. I give some great examples on the podcast.

Don’t forget to  ACTUALLY pray at some point when someone asks you to pray for them!

I give some tips on how I preserve my integrity and ensure I actually do pray. You know, you’ve forgotten to pray before. 🙂 I know I have! It’s easy to do; we are busy people.

Be sure to check out how I use technology to keep myself honest.

I pray you enjoy them!  Let me know!

Ever thought about what NOT to do when someone asks you to pray for them? Share on X

Prefer a video for tips when someone asks you to pray for them? Check out my Youtube video!

Be a woman of integrity when someone asks you to pray for them. Share on X

Ok, I’ve made it easy to remember when someone asks you to pray for them.

Remember the 3 “P”s of praying for others:

Pray – Duh. You gotta pray for them, right?

Provide – offer practical help and support

Protect – Protect their privacy and their reputation by keeping your mouth shut and not talking about their struggles.

Ready for the “big pic”?
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Tips and REAL talk about praying for others - when someone asks you to pray
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Married to a is a blog for pastors wives focused on offering encouragement for a pastor’s wife as well as insight on being a pastor’s wife…from one pastor’s wife to another.


  1. I tell them I will. And then I do! With everything I’ve got! Prayer has made all the difference to me. And I hope it will to them!

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