Normally, I write speaking directly to pastor’s wives. But, today, in this post, I am going to make it more geared toward Christian women. The reason is becuase I think we are taught so much about submission as Christian women, that we tend to negate our own needs. I’m not talking about selfish needs, I’m talking about the basic needs to be valued, seen and heard. Do you know what I mean? 

Have you ever felt your voice was spoken over? Or that you were considered “less than” because you are a woman? It happens far too often -especially in church and ministry cirlces. I wrote about that on my companion blog, GodslyGirl.com. You can read that post here: https://godsygirl.com/women-in-leadership-in-church-and-the-challenges-they-face/

Use Your Voice: Why Speaking Up Matters More Than You Think

Whether you’re speaking up in your marriage, in ministry, on the job, or in your own head, your voice matters. The other day, I was talking to my older cousin. She knows I’ve been in the fight of my life these days.

I try to hide it, but she knows.

Anyway, she ended our conversation with “You matter, too, Teri.” 

It almost came out of nowhere. But, oh, how I needed to hear that. 

So, as you read this blog post by a “nobody special” from the midwestern United States, please allow me to say the same to you. 

As your Christian sister, I want to remind you that you matter, too.

Repeat after me…

Now is the hardest part.

Ignore the years of socialization that may have told you differently. 

Instead, I want you to say with Holy Spirit confidence, “I matter, too.” 

I mean it. Say it. Say it now.

Ok. Let’s move on. 

Let’s talk about why it’s time to use your voice—and how doing so can transform your life.

Shucks, it can possibly transform the lives of other people, too!

Let’s get started by talking about how God encourages people to speak up and use their voices in the Bible. 

1. The Biblical Case for Speaking Up

The Bible is filled with tons of courageous people who spoke up when it mattered most—often at great personal risk.

Think about Esther.

She was a woman who had every reason to stay silent.

Her comfort, safety, and very life were at risk when she approached the king to advocate for her people.

But prompted by her cousin Mordecai’s now-famous words, “Who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14), Esther used her voice—and changed the course of history.

Then there’s Moses, who doubted his own speech, yet God still chose him to be the voice of freedom for His people.

God told him, “Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say” (Exodus 4:12).

God equips the voices He calls.

I hope this gives you confidence to use your voice boldly!

If you’ve been feeling silenced or unsure about your voice, remember: God has always worked through people willing to speak with courage and truth.

2. The Silent Struggle: What Happens When We Don’t Use Our Voice

Did you know that not using your voice has real consequences—emotionally, spiritually, and relationally?

When you consistently suppress your needs, opinions, or boundaries, you can begin to feel invisible.

I have so many stories about feeling invisible.

By nature, I am a rather quiet person.

I am an introvert.

Somehow, I quelched that part of myself to craft my career.

I learned to use my voice. I learned to advocate for myself.

You must too.

The time comes when you must flip a switch and say, “No, I do not want that” or “No, you cannot do that.”

Silence can destroy you

Over time, stuffing your feelings and silencing yourself can lead to resentment, burnout, and even depression.

You might find yourself questioning your worth, wondering if your thoughts matter, or feeling like you’re merely a supporting character in someone else’s story.

Aye, there’s the rub.

It an make you sick!

Research from the field of psychology shows that suppressing emotions or avoiding conflict for long periods of time can actually impact your physical health—contributing to anxiety, headaches, and digestive issues (Caes et al., 2017).

Emotionally, it fosters internalized shame and helplessness.

Spiritually, it distances you from the abundant, free life Jesus promised.

Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly”(John 10:10). A life of silence in the face of injustice, mistreatment, or even your own needs is not abundant life!

When you don’t use your voice, you deny yourself the opportunity to grow.

I think you also deny others the chance to hear what God has uniquely placed in you.

3. Advocating for Yourself Is Not Selfish—It’s Stewardship

Let’s clear up a common Christian misunderstanding: advocating for yourself is not the same as pride or selfishness.

Jesus modeled healthy assertiveness.

Hey, He set boundaries, walked away from draining crowds, and spoke up in defense of truth—even when it was unpopular.

In Luke 4:30, Jesus “walked right through the crowd and went on His way” when people tried to harm Him.

He knew His value.

He knew His mission.

And He used His voice accordingly.

As a Christian woman, using your voice can be an act of holy stewardship.

God gave you a mind, a heart, and a perspective for a reason, Christian Sister.

Speaking up for what is right, asking for what you need, and saying “no” when you must are all ways to honor the life God entrusted to you.

Do not let anyone make you feel guilty about it.

4. Using Your Voice Builds Confidence and Helps Others

Each time you use your voice, I genuinely beleive you build the muscle of courage.

It doesn’t always have to be dramatic.

Sometimes, using your voice looks like:

• Telling your husband, gently but clearly, that you need emotional support.
• Asking for a raise or fair treatment at work.
• Sharing your testimony in church, even though your knees are shaking.
• Writing that blog, filming that video, or launching that ministry you’ve dreamed of for years.

Your courage to speak up also gives others permission to do the same.

Think of how many women stay silent because they’ve never seen someone like them speak up.

You could be the example someone else needs to believe it’s okay to tell the truth and still be loved, respected, and safe.

Listen. Using your voice is never just about you—it creates ripple effects.

5. What Using Your Voice Looks Like in Real Life

Let’s say you’re in a ministry where your ideas are often ignored, and decisions are made without your input.

You’ve convinced yourself it’s “just not worth it” to say anything.

But something inside you feels uneasy.

One day, instead of staying silent, you respectfully share your concern and suggest a new way forward.

Your voice is shaky, but you press on.

That moment doesn’t just change the meeting—it shifts something in you.

You begin to believe again that your voice matters!

I love sharing this with you because, as I said, our Christian brothers can be intimidated by our voices -as could our husbands.

That is thier problem – use your voice!

Example number 2…Your Husband!

This one happens to me all the time. I likely do it too, but that is another topic. 🙂

Maybe your husband often talks over you in conversations like mine.

You’ve swallowed your frustration for years, but recently, it’s chipped away at your confidence.

Instead of harboring resentment, you sit him down and lovingly say, “I feel dismissed when I’m interrupted. I need to feel heard and respected.”

That’s using your voice—not in anger, but in truth and love.

You’re not being selfish by speaking up. It’s because you matter.

He is not more important than you because of his role.

You are enough.

You are equipped in Jesus!

6. How to Start Using Your Voice Today

Let me be clear. Using your voice doesn’t mean being loud or aggressive.

It simply means being honest, present, and faithful to speak when God prompts.

Simple as that.

Here’s how you might begin:

• Pray for wisdom and timing. Ask God to guide your words and lead you in truth (Psalm 19:14).
• Start small. Practice speaking up in low-pressure situations—like sharing your opinion in a meeting or expressing a preference at home.
• Know your values. When you’re clear on what matters to you, it’s easier to speak with conviction.
• Prepare and practice. If you’re nervous, write it down or rehearse it with a trusted friend.
• Remember your audience. Your worth is not tied to how people respond. Obeying God in using your voice is the win.

7. My Final Thoughts: Your Voice Has Power

I canno say it enough.

You are not invisible.

You are not weak. You are not “too much” or “not enough.”

You are a woman created in the image of God, filled with His Spirit, and called for such a time as this.

When you choose to use your voice, you’re not just making noise—you’re building bridges, setting boundaries, creating change, and walking in freedom.

Don’t let fear, past wounds, or cultural expectations rob you of the power of your God-given voice.

Speak up.
Stand firm.
Use your voice—for His glory and your good.

I love you!

A Journal Prompt for You:

“Where in my life have I been silent when God may be prompting me to speak?”

A Sample Prayer:

Lord, thank You for giving me a voice and a story. Teach me how to use it wisely and with courage. Remind me that I am fully known and loved, even when I’m afraid to speak. Empower me to speak truth in love and walk in the freedom You’ve called me to. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Source

Caes, L., Orchard, A., & Christie, D. (2017). Connecting the Mind–Body Split: Understanding the Relationship between Symptoms and Emotional Well-Being in Chronic Pain and Functional Gastrointestinal Disorders. Healthcare, 5(4), 93. https://doi.org/10.3390/healthcare5040093

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