Advice for Pastor’s Wives

Getting along with women in the church. Not always easy, pastor’s wife.

Have you ever not liked someone? Tell the truth, pastor’s wife.

Sure you have. It’s part of our normal condition called “humanity”.

Now, here’s the kicker: have you not liked someone that attends your church? Ouch, right?

I would love to say it’s easy getting along with women in the church all the time – but it’s not.

Only the fake and phony portray an image of liking everyone all the time. I wish. But the reality is that sometimes …every once in a while, God allows someone to enter your life that really “fries your cheese”.

So what’s a pastor’s wife to do? Do we fake it? Do we avoid them or do we ask God to help them find another church?

As with every challenge in life, this one is no different. The answers and guidance we seek lies in the Word of God. His Word tells us, admonishes us and commands us to love. We have to choose to obey it to grow in maturity.

Obedience has NOTHING to do with feelings. We will not always “feel” like doing what God says. Feelings can never be the guiding force in our life. Too fleeting. Too unstable. Instead, hinge our actions on that which we can wholeheartedly depend on – God’s Word.

So, how do we do it? We simply walk in love. We do loving things for those people until the feelings follow.

That means we go out of our way to show kindness to that person. Take them to lunch, bless them as often as we can. Go completely out of our way to love on them and give them lots of hugs. The carnal part of your nature will want to avoid them, but don’t! Seek them out and pursue peace.

It will “feel” fake and pointless, but who cares how it feels.

Just do it.

Walk in love.

Not because you are a pastor’s wife, not because you are “first lady”, but because you are Christian. Your kind works bring glory to the Father and He will be pleased.

Wish there was an easier answer, a simpler solution. But, you are on a “big girl” mission. Much is given in your role and much is required – both in front and behind the scenes.

Amen or whatever?

“Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord”.Hebrews 12:14

“Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you.”Luke 6:28


Can you think of another supporting scripture? Help us! Put it in the comments section below.

Do you have advice?  Comments, please!

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